They all said I should see The Godfather. Nope. Not me. If EVERYBODY loved it, how could I? I’m not going. It too popular. I don’t do popular. Popular is not cool enough for the royal me. I musr be different.

They said Osprey or Gregory.  Nope.  Not me.  I go to Ebay and scour the listings for the very best buy.  The one that will impress everyone.  A great pack at an amazing price. “What a deal,” they will all say. THEY don’t care.  Before long I have 3 bags.  All sub standard. I’ve spent as much as the Osprey would have cost and then I buy the Osprey Volt 60.

I will return one.  Sell one.  And keep the last one just in case I lose the Osprey.  You know, drop it by accident or something on the trail.  Idiot.

Good thing I don’t drink anymore.